How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
