Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
