You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Randomize
