thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
