My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
