great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
This is the high leading the old right now
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Randomize
