If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
What a dumb baby whore.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
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