Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Do vagina's smell?
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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