I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Houston, we have a squirter
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Randomize