Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize
