After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
