awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
