Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
