i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
