Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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