I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Randomize
