If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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