you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
