i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Randomize