Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Randomize
