Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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