do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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