Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
