I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
