I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
