i just wanna soil my oats bro
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
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