My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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