You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
