just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Randomize
