I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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