Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
try to milk me bitch
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