I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
