is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Randomize
