Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
