i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
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