I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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