i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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