Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Randomize
