Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Randomize
