Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
