Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Randomize
