She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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