State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
