I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Randomize
