Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Randomize