Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
