After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Randomize
