I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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