You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Randomize
