So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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