She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
You are the jesus of drinking
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize